place they call it, HOME SWEET HOME!


may 9, 2009


it has been 3 weeks since i last stayed at home, slept on my own bed.
then where have i been staying?
baby's house. for 3 weeks? yes! for 3 weeks already.
i know, it's not right, not going home, staying here so often, seeing each other so often.
but, it's like, even if i go home, i am all alone, celia and i don really talk, mum and i cant communicate. all i can do is just to stare at the computer when i reach home after work.
but staying at baby's house, i gets the company.
someone to talk to, to complain to about work, about my tiredness, someone to cuddle when i am sleeping (though i don really like to be touched when i am sleeping, but once a while, YES!),
and so many more reasons why i prefer to stay here.


jing and baolin, reminded me about why hong wei and i feelings faded away, cause we used to see each other eveyday, and the same thing will happen to me and baby if i were to contiune to live here.
i know, i know.
but, i really don enjoy staying home.


well, nx week will be the forth week, that's making up to a month.
baby will say, i want you to stay here forever, just go pack everything in your closet.
some while i wonder, am i doing the right thing?
is that the correct choice i have made?
why am i doing this?
just gonna take a step and see slowly, i guess....

WITHOUT A TITLE

I know i know... haven been updating my blog for a long time.
i am really that lazy la... can?? haha...
sometimes i wish there's a blog where i can just record them all with just my speech instead of typing. cos firstly, by the time i type them slowly, i forget what i want to say already.
and with the accent, it will be much easier for a "English failure" like me to express my thoughts.


wow... just a glance, i am 22 already. 6 april. people!!! for those who forgot! haha..
had a very simple lunch with baby at jack's place and dinner at cafe cartel with jing, weisen and ah lan. and then we went down to chervon. baby ordered ice cream cake from Anderson's. didnt got the time to do the pictures.. so... willl upload the pictures when i am free.


got a "fengshuai shi fu" over to "qing shen" (change god) they called it in chinese.. while cos previously hong wei slept over and he said he felt "something".. and so did baby.
told mummy about it and she asked ard and got to know this "fengshuai shifu".
he said those weird things we felt are all just our "zhu xian" and that cos our old "guan ying niang niang" is not there anymore. that's why there are dirty things coming into our house which cause all the uneasiness. anyway, the"fengshuai shifu" changed our god today. everything is suppose to turn out well.. before he invited the new god into our house, a "donno what god" possessed his body. he gave us 4D and say will open. he took a look at my palm and said that i will have a good fortune when i reach 34 years. by the age of 34, i can start my own business. i wil have whatever i want in future. haha.... then he said i am good in studies, which is like sooooo not true!!!! anyway, all we wish is peace in our house. h told my mum, that my dad's having two affairs outside and he is seriously big financial problem now. well, all we need to do is to take care of mummy in future.


alrighty, updates end... my dumb bf's out from his bath... and here to disturb.


next update probably another 1 month later ba. =X

it's all about work


last week, one day
i was out for lunch with Candice alone,
and finally I've got the chance to POP the question.
"so... Do you know why Vivian dislike me?"
She was a little shock hearing the question. But her answer was true and steady.
"well, sometimes in life, you don't always get to meet all people who likes you.
Sometimes, ones just doesn't click with the other."
She didn't answer my question directly, but i don't blame her. Probably she thinks that
she should not be involve with this conflict.
and then conversation ended with just a final sentence,
"just give her some time. she will accept you one day when she gets to know you better."


this week, today
out for lunch with Kelly alone as Candice and Vivian went for course for 3 days.
i hesitated a while and finally POP the question again cos i really want to clear my doubts.
"so... why do Vivian dislike me that much? i can feel it. Did she tell you anything."
and then i get my answers, in FULL.


well, this is what happen:-
everything happened on the first day of work.


*THE FIRST IMPRESSION*
She complained that i was staring real hard at her desk and what she was doing when i did some photocopying as the machine is directly right in front of her desk. ( but i really can't rmb doing that)


*FOLLOWED BY THE REST*
1. She told them that i was copying her dressing style but that is how i normally dress sometimes.
(please help me prove that. leggings and a top.)


2. She calls me a copy cat cos whatever they want to eat i eat the same. ( that's bcos i donno what to eat and i don mind having the same food. )


3. She told them that i am always flipping my hair in front of her like as though i was trying to show off my long hair when hers is much much longer than mine. (not as if she's a guy, so why would i wanna do that? dont get it)


4. she thinks that i am like a busy body cause i will walk over to join their conversation or what they are looking at sometimes. (but that's only because i am trying to fit myself in the group thick skin-ly.)


*THE THIRD PARTIES SAYINGS*
kelly consoled me, she told me that Candice and her actually told her off a little.
They told her that what whatever she is acting wasn't very nice. and they explained to her why i have such behavior like being busybody and stuff.
and that i have this dressing style its common.
well, she said they tried saying good things to her for me and talk out some senses.. but it doesnt seems to work.


*FINAL WORDS*
Really don't get it. She actually hate me sooo much till she told Kelly she is SUPER happy cos she won't be seeing me for the next 3 days.


i know... its very childish right? guess how old is she?
.....
...
...
....
...
...
she is 28!! 6 years older than me!!!
i feel like primary school.


well, whatever it is.. everyone told me that it shouldn't be bothering me.
so... if she dont like me... then so be it.
anyway, it doesnt really matter.

Living in a REALISTIC life....


Now that i am out at work in the "REAL" world,
i see people with all kinds of characters.
People who smile for the sake of smiling,
People who only talk to you when they need your help,
People who backstab,
People who gossip with other People they call their "friend",
more... more... more to discover.


I just like a baby in the "outside" world.
So much to learn, so much to handle, so much to explore.
Like what chekchek told me before,
why would i rather suffer outside then working with him,
pay aint as much of cos,
but at least i am free at work,
work from 9am to 1pm.
and the rest of the time in the day i am free..
and now that i am working outside,
working hours from 8.30am to 6pm,
plus all the politics to handle.


Bitch and baby told me that i would need to give them more time
to know me.
but.... i can really feel that they don really like me.
big companies are like that.
people wear mask to work everyday,
you will never know when you will get backstab.
everything you say and do, have to be written or via email(black and white)
people help one and other more.
i got bullied by one of the treasury manager on the 2nd week
my shi fu and supervisor and manager was not around.
and i was sooooo new.
the treasury manager actually tot that i know how to do it and he put in on task,
in the end, i did the wrong thing and was scolded like hell.
when my shi fu and supervisor learned about it,
they did help me saying that they alr told him that he should be doing that on his
own and then onwards, he bu shuang me.


unlike swire day.......
people are more friendly,
partly cos the company is smaller.
though the job load is much more...
but... people are nicer... i felt happier.
or many becos david was there too..
i always had someone to accompany me to lunch and talk to.
hmm..
didnt appreciated it then till now i realized,
how nice those people were.


probably baby's right,
once i learn to have the bo chap attitude,
i wont feel stress over it.. everything will be taking it easy.
give them more time... i should be able to talk to them more.


alright.. enough updates,
tata.
-off to sweet talk with baby-

BOX OF LOVE





Do not listen to them darling, for now our love is free.

Your kiss is liquid fire, scortching my soul.
But dont ever stop, because I long for you more.
No one will ever come between us, never.
Because I make this promise now, always and forever.

Sylvia Sisk

First Quarrel


21 Feb 2009


9.14pm
-Start of agruement-
Today's the first time we really quarrel.
Quarrel about?
About him smoking.
I will never understand why cant he stop?
cant he quit?
he said this time i really pushed him too much.
i tried the soft way, the "sha jiao" way. but it didnt work out.
Then i tried the hard way, the "fa pi qi" way too.. it didnt work out either.
he knows its harmful. but still.. haiz.


fellow friends,
if u have got any good way to help a smoker quit smoking,
pls do share it with me.
i will do anything to help him quit it..


11.00pm
-end of arguement-
things got better.
we talked and then finally we came out with an agreement.
agreement letter is still under process.
once done and signed, i will scan out for prove. and all of you people can
be our witnesses.


next topic
wanted to update on the valentine's day celebration.
but then again, we didnt celebrate it also.
so... nothing to update.
baby promised we will postpone the celebration to nx month.
he promise to do a job and proper one.
with a proper date, a proper dinner and a proper present.
looking forward to it!!!
recently still got so engross in my love life.
no time to blog.
lazy to blog also.=X
till then,
i will blog again!!