pinky thingy

2009-05-09T15:59:00.002+08:00

place they call it, HOME SWEET HOME!

may 9, 2009

it has been 3 weeks since i last stayed at home, slept on my own bed.
then where have i been staying?
baby's house. for 3 weeks? yes! for 3 weeks already.
i know, it's not right, not going home, staying here so often, seeing each other so often.
but, it's like, even if i go home, i am all alone, celia and i don really talk, mum and i cant communicate. all i can do is just to stare at the computer when i reach home after work.
but staying at baby's house, i gets the company.
someone to talk to, to complain to about work, about my tiredness, someone to cuddle when i am sleeping (though i don really like to be touched when i am sleeping, but once a while, YES!),
and so many more reasons why i prefer to stay here.

jing and baolin, reminded me about why hong wei and i feelings faded away, cause we used to see each other eveyday, and the same thing will happen to me and baby if i were to contiune to live here.
i know, i know.
but, i really don enjoy staying home.

well, nx week will be the forth week, that's making up to a month.
baby will say, i want you to stay here forever, just go pack everything in your closet.
some while i wonder, am i doing the right thing?
is that the correct choice i have made?
why am i doing this?
just gonna take a step and see slowly, i guess....

2009-04-10T22:49:00.003+08:00

WITHOUT A TITLE

I know i know... haven been updating my blog for a long time.
i am really that lazy la... can?? haha...
sometimes i wish there's a blog where i can just record them all with just my speech instead of typing. cos firstly, by the time i type them slowly, i forget what i want to say already.
and with the accent, it will be much easier for a "English failure" like me to express my thoughts.

wow... just a glance, i am 22 already. 6 april. people!!! for those who forgot! haha..
had a very simple lunch with baby at jack's place and dinner at cafe cartel with jing, weisen and ah lan. and then we went down to chervon. baby ordered ice cream cake from Anderson's. didnt got the time to do the pictures.. so... willl upload the pictures when i am free.

got a "fengshuai shi fu" over to "qing shen" (change god) they called it in chinese.. while cos previously hong wei slept over and he said he felt "something".. and so did baby.
told mummy about it and she asked ard and got to know this "fengshuai shifu".
he said those weird things we felt are all just our "zhu xian" and that cos our old "guan ying niang niang" is not there anymore. that's why there are dirty things coming into our house which cause all the uneasiness. anyway, the"fengshuai shifu" changed our god today. everything is suppose to turn out well.. before he invited the new god into our house, a "donno what god" possessed his body. he gave us 4D and say will open. he took a look at my palm and said that i will have a good fortune when i reach 34 years. by the age of 34, i can start my own business. i wil have whatever i want in future. haha.... then he said i am good in studies, which is like sooooo not true!!!! anyway, all we wish is peace in our house. h told my mum, that my dad's having two affairs outside and he is seriously big financial problem now. well, all we need to do is to take care of mummy in future.

alrighty, updates end... my dumb bf's out from his bath... and here to disturb.

next update probably another 1 month later ba. =X

2009-03-18T23:50:00.001+08:00

it's all about work

last week, one day
i was out for lunch with Candice alone,
and finally I've got the chance to POP the question.
"so... Do you know why Vivian dislike me?"
She was a little shock hearing the question. But her answer was true and steady.
"well, sometimes in life, you don't always get to meet all people who likes you.
Sometimes, ones just doesn't click with the other."
She didn't answer my question directly, but i don't blame her. Probably she thinks that
she should not be involve with this conflict.
and then conversation ended with just a final sentence,
"just give her some time. she will accept you one day when she gets to know you better."

this week, today
out for lunch with Kelly alone as Candice and Vivian went for course for 3 days.
i hesitated a while and finally POP the question again cos i really want to clear my doubts.
"so... why do Vivian dislike me that much? i can feel it. Did she tell you anything."
and then i get my answers, in FULL.

well, this is what happen:-
everything happened on the first day of work.

*THE FIRST IMPRESSION*
She complained that i was staring real hard at her desk and what she was doing when i did some photocopying as the machine is directly right in front of her desk. ( but i really can't rmb doing that)

*FOLLOWED BY THE REST*
1. She told them that i was copying her dressing style but that is how i normally dress sometimes.
(please help me prove that. leggings and a top.)

2. She calls me a copy cat cos whatever they want to eat i eat the same. ( that's bcos i donno what to eat and i don mind having the same food. )

3. She told them that i am always flipping my hair in front of her like as though i was trying to show off my long hair when hers is much much longer than mine. (not as if she's a guy, so why would i wanna do that? dont get it)

4. she thinks that i am like a busy body cause i will walk over to join their conversation or what they are looking at sometimes. (but that's only because i am trying to fit myself in the group thick skin-ly.)

*THE THIRD PARTIES SAYINGS*
kelly consoled me, she told me that Candice and her actually told her off a little.
They told her that what whatever she is acting wasn't very nice. and they explained to her why i have such behavior like being busybody and stuff.
and that i have this dressing style its common.
well, she said they tried saying good things to her for me and talk out some senses.. but it doesnt seems to work.

*FINAL WORDS*
Really don't get it. She actually hate me sooo much till she told Kelly she is SUPER happy cos she won't be seeing me for the next 3 days.

i know... its very childish right? guess how old is she?
.....
...
...
....
...
...
she is 28!! 6 years older than me!!!
i feel like primary school.

well, whatever it is.. everyone told me that it shouldn't be bothering me.
so... if she dont like me... then so be it.
anyway, it doesnt really matter.

2009-03-06T22:56:00.002+08:00

"you have got something that made me fall for you"

"i will always cherish my darling"

"i feel so xin fu now"

- words that were said from you..

sometimes i get so angry with myself for throwing nonsense attitude at you.

but ended up, you will still coax me and shower me with even more care and love.

the logic isnt right.

though i never said it..

but i'm already certain that my decision was right!

i am sooo in love with you.

THANK YOU BABY!

2009-03-06T22:34:00.002+08:00

Living in a REALISTIC life....

Now that i am out at work in the "REAL" world,
i see people with all kinds of characters.
People who smile for the sake of smiling,
People who only talk to you when they need your help,
People who backstab,
People who gossip with other People they call their "friend",
more... more... more to discover.

I just like a baby in the "outside" world.
So much to learn, so much to handle, so much to explore.
Like what chekchek told me before,
why would i rather suffer outside then working with him,
pay aint as much of cos,
but at least i am free at work,
work from 9am to 1pm.
and the rest of the time in the day i am free..
and now that i am working outside,
working hours from 8.30am to 6pm,
plus all the politics to handle.

Bitch and baby told me that i would need to give them more time
to know me.
but.... i can really feel that they don really like me.
big companies are like that.
people wear mask to work everyday,
you will never know when you will get backstab.
everything you say and do, have to be written or via email(black and white)
people help one and other more.
i got bullied by one of the treasury manager on the 2nd week
my shi fu and supervisor and manager was not around.
and i was sooooo new.
the treasury manager actually tot that i know how to do it and he put in on task,
in the end, i did the wrong thing and was scolded like hell.
when my shi fu and supervisor learned about it,
they did help me saying that they alr told him that he should be doing that on his
own and then onwards, he bu shuang me.

unlike swire day.......
people are more friendly,
partly cos the company is smaller.
though the job load is much more...
but... people are nicer... i felt happier.
or many becos david was there too..
i always had someone to accompany me to lunch and talk to.
hmm..
didnt appreciated it then till now i realized,
how nice those people were.

probably baby's right,
once i learn to have the bo chap attitude,
i wont feel stress over it.. everything will be taking it easy.
give them more time... i should be able to talk to them more.

alright.. enough updates,
tata.
-off to sweet talk with baby-

2009-02-26T19:51:00.002+08:00

BOX OF LOVE

Do not listen to them darling, for now our love is free.

Your kiss is liquid fire, scortching my soul.
But dont ever stop, because I long for you more.
No one will ever come between us, never.
Because I make this promise now, always and forever.

Sylvia Sisk

2009-02-21T21:14:00.001+08:00

First Quarrel

21 Feb 2009

9.14pm
-Start of agruement-
Today's the first time we really quarrel.
Quarrel about?
About him smoking.
I will never understand why cant he stop?
cant he quit?
he said this time i really pushed him too much.
i tried the soft way, the "sha jiao" way. but it didnt work out.
Then i tried the hard way, the "fa pi qi" way too.. it didnt work out either.
he knows its harmful. but still.. haiz.

fellow friends,
if u have got any good way to help a smoker quit smoking,
pls do share it with me.
i will do anything to help him quit it..

11.00pm
-end of arguement-
things got better.
we talked and then finally we came out with an agreement.
agreement letter is still under process.
once done and signed, i will scan out for prove. and all of you people can
be our witnesses.

next topic
wanted to update on the valentine's day celebration.
but then again, we didnt celebrate it also.
so... nothing to update.
baby promised we will postpone the celebration to nx month.
he promise to do a job and proper one.
with a proper date, a proper dinner and a proper present.
looking forward to it!!!
recently still got so engross in my love life.
no time to blog.
lazy to blog also.=X
till then,
i will blog again!!

2009-01-25T10:53:00.003+08:00

NEW YEAR, NEW SKIN!!!

wha!! this time round, i did it on my own!!

Dont call me a blog dumb dumb anymore!

i did it on my own.

proud of you, Sonia Chew!

so looking forward to meeting you gals!

30th!!!! cant wait to show u girls my new prince charming!

=X don ever let him see this or else...

he's soo going to fly!!

Envy me people!

For all you want..

I'm having the sweetest dream of my life.

Donno how long this dream will last.

i hope its forever!!

DINNER COOKED BY HIM ON 19/01/2009

don really look very appetizing, but trust me.

it's quite nice.

Rate: 3.5/5

Always wish for a bf who can cook for me, or even cook together.

was quite not use to it though, cos it used to me only me in the kitchen and

me asking him to go out.

now i am the one who was asked to leave the kitchen and wait for him to cook.

it was really sweet though!

but... i want to help!

Baby,

thank you!

alright FOLKS!!

HAPPY CHINESE NEW YEAR!

may all receive fat fat ang bao this year!

HUAT AH!!!!!

2009-01-18T22:53:00.002+08:00

A slacky weekend

Gosh!!! He saw my blog!!!
no more boyfriend's complains in future.
Damnit!
stayed over at his place for the weekend.
slack and grow fat!
other than eat and sleep and watch pp steam.
hmm...
what else did we do?
Ma god! u cannot imagine how much we eat for this past 2 days!
his dad tot we are pigs or something.
he wil buy back breakfast... and the amount of food for 4 person can
last till lunch and sometimes even dinner.
so scary rite??

though we don always go out.
spent almost the all weekend at his place.
hmm... i am happy here.
peeps..
i am really happy!
wanna share so much of ma happiness with all of u.
but i gt to think of others as well.
people like david lee... =X (will get bored if i were to "hao lian" too much!)
all i can say is......
as for now...
i'm XIN FU to the max!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

replies:
david: hey man! don wanna give u so much updates.
am afraid u can stand the sweetness.
Bitch: ma god... so much things to tell you! but so lazy to type!
nana: how will i ever forget you??? =)
Iz: err... who is this? =X

2009-01-14T14:19:00.002+08:00

QUICK UPDATE!

Dearest everyone,
in ma honeymoon period now.
No time to update ma blog!
am totally in our own lala land man!!

to David: sorry daddy! too lazy to mail u!!
sonia outz...
back to ma honeymoon life!!
=)

2009-01-14T07:49:00.000+08:00

Thanks baby, for the yummy breakfast!

4hotdogs, 2eggs, warm milk

2009-01-04T12:50:00.002+08:00

2 Jan 2009

there went ma best listening ears!! Off to canada for his studies!
Farewell, daddy david!
Hoi Ting !!!

Night.
Slept over at his place today.
We watched Tv and slacked.
Nothing much to update also!
Nothing interersting happen!

he cuddled me to sleep in his cosy bed.
felt like a little girl again, when he patted me to sleep.
he showered me with lots of love and kisses as if there're all free!
he aint selfish at all.

3 Jan 2009
Rushed home in the morning, needed to wait for
the delivery man to deliver chek chek's sofa and coffee table.
then after, i went back to his place.
didnt go out, cos both are so broke!!
he promised he will bring me out once he found a job
and then that's went the time we will meet jing and beng again!
so many things happen lately.
donno where to start saying!
Selfish me!
onli though of ma own happiness and hurt others.
but everyone says life is unfair!
and a relationship the ain't right nor wrong!
well, such words coming from me only make it sounds like an excuse!
and its a terrible one!
hmm.. what can i say!
i am in the wrong first!
even f i cry or get sad... who can i blame?
No one but myself!

4 Jan 2009
here i am again...
still slacking at his place.
talks and more talks.
trying to know each other even better.
one day,
i will laugh like him
smile like him
talk like him
act and react like him.

Dear peeps,
please don't worry about me!
i am doing real fine now. i can feel lots of love and care from him!
No complains and regrets!
to Bitch, intro to you someday and you can see that he is really treating me well!!
to David, thanks for everything! (you know what i mean)
to jing, one day u will understand why i will make such a path.
to everyone else, thanks for giving me the support!
i am greatful to have all!!!
love you peeps!!!

thank you!!!!!

2009-01-01T23:16:00.003+08:00

you brought sweetness back into ma life..

thank you, baby!

2008-12-21T09:14:00.003+08:00

Dearest Sara And Poay Joo,

HAPPY 21St BIRTHDAY SWEETIES!!

2008-12-21T01:18:00.002+08:00

i am a grown up now.
what kind of life i wanna live in, who i wanna be with
i shuld know better den anyone else.
or i should say, i have to know more than anyone else.
who is he?
what kind of person is he?
what he likes?
what he don like?
everyone would ask me to continue with hong wei,
and he is just a passer by
is he raelly just a passer by?
how sure can u be tat he is not treatin u as a spare tire?
how sure can u be tat he can give u more than what hong wei's giving now?
when he don even know me well..
i am sooo confuse.

went for movie with him today. "YES MAN!"
then to bibi's birthday.
bibi didn ask much abt him.
had some pics taken, he kept asking if i will be in trouble
ate some cake,
was really nice, from coffee bean.
den we headed down to chervon.
on the way there,
he asked me lots of questions.
(who the hell will ask the gal if he could chase her
and at the same time, talk nice things abt her bf and
tell her that actually her bf do love her.)
he said he like me..
i can NEVER tell him that i feel the same way too.
cos that will make me EXACTLY the same as her..
and i really don like it.
i know is very unfair to him and to hong wei.
save me anyone!!

2008-12-19T21:33:00.001+08:00

he said, maybe we shouldn't be talking to each other already.
it hurts a little.
when i started to fall into the trap.
he pulled me out quick.
he thinks its unfair.

2008-12-19T18:47:00.002+08:00

what is love?
why do people need love?
how to tell that i am in love?
how to know if its the right one for you?

ma god.
i really donno what the fuck am i doing?
why does dada wants to be with me?
is it because he love me?
is it a habit of having someone with you?
why am i always stuck in this kind of shit?
what's holding me back?
cos i cant bear to live such a long r/s?
cos i still love him?
cos its a habit?

everyone say,
talk to him about it.
but he never like to talk about this kind of thing.
he say our r/s is fine.
just stay the way it is.
he say if we break up, he won't find another gal.
cos he is lazy to start a r/s all over again.
so.....
its becos he don wanna find another r/s
that's why he is with me?
or...

confuse confuse!!

2008-12-17T21:32:00.002+08:00

lastest update for ma little blog

ma little blog's turning dusty soon i realise!
well, nothing much to write actually.

Sat(13/12) - Mon(15/12)

went KL for the weekends, supposingly to celebrate dada's 24th bday,
but ended up, it was quite a bad holiday.
get all biten by the bed bugs hiden in the budget hotel's bed.
ma poor tighs and legs and backs are all so swollen and red.
wanted to go to KL's Zouk but the ppl say its not hot there.
so ended up in their so called KL most hottest club now, "poppy"..
nothing compare to singapore though. music's normal RnB. not that new.
ppl wont as crazy, they drink more than dance.
took a few pictures with dada's good frens but the photos ain't with me.
sad!!!

Tuesday (16/12)

stayed at home, sleep whole day.
enjoy ma last day of non working life!!

Wednesday (17/12)

am back to work at chek chek's place.
tot as a teacher, but actually is to clear the accounting shits.
boring office life. and plus i don even know if am paid for it.
thats one bad thing abt working with own ppl.
money wise is so hard to talk abt.
though is good life job, only from 9am to 1pm.
but still need to wake up so early at 7am.
been slacking for too long man!
den later in the afternoon,
head down with cc to town to get xmas cum bday pressies.
onli manage to get half a pressie though.

"to cc, (though he will nv read it)
thanks for the pleasant & crappy evening!!"

having a busy weekend this week.
bibi's 21st bday on sat and bitches xmas dinner on sun.
its so "nan de" i'm having busy weekends.

ma god. its 10 already!!
off to bed. need to wake up early tml.
so damn not use to it la!!!
SHIT!!!

2008-12-02T23:10:00.003+08:00

Study?? Ya right.

Studying on the Topic, "Facial Expressions!"

I swear i can never go out to study with anyone but myself.

Some scenes to share:

Meet Miao Miao:-
Miao Miao: Wha, today so slck leh! Dont feel like studying.
Sonia: Wha, Me too leh.. But cannot cannot. ok we study a while first!
Miao Miao: ok!
(10 mins of slience)
Sonia: Wha, cannot study. Wanna go shopping?
Miao Miao: Ah! ok loh! Lets go!

Meet Jing:-
Sonia: Oh No! i feel like singing k! i saw party world leh.
Jing: later go see the price lo. Ask my bf wanna go not.
Sonia: okok! Study first later than say.
(5mins silence, 30mins talking, 30 mins for lunch, 30mins back to chit chat)
Sonia: So ur bf ok? Wanna go?
Jing: ok! meet at 5.30pm. Time now is 3.00pm
Sonia: okok! Leave at 4.00pm
(1hour continue chitting)
Jing: times up! Lets go!

Meet Celia:-
(30mins study, 30 mins lunch)
(1hour study)
Celia: take picture leh!!!
Sonia: okok..
*pose1, 2, 3, 4, 5........30.......40*
Sonia: ok need to leave liao! dinner time!

so i guess, i need to do it alone.

2008-11-26T22:04:00.005+08:00

back to my old life

26 Nov 2008,
he has moved back home.
well, the nx question everyone will ask is what happen?
Nope, we are still together. Not break up!
Then?
Reason simple,
economic crisis went down. therefore, he lost his job.
his company's business was affecting, causing lots of ppl in his dept
to lost their job.
that's why he moved back home.

and now, back to where we started.
seeing each other only on weekends.
actually i should say its a good thing.
Not seeing each other everyday,
giving us more chance to cherish our time more
when we meet.

now both of us are jobless. he said he will try to find a temp job 1st.
until new yr then look for a real job.
Tot he will be upset when he tell mi the bad news.
but he kept saying that he is okay.

4 more days to my exams,
study for 5 hours in the library today.
to many, 5 hours of study when exams are just days away is little.
but to me, miss slacker, 5hours has break my record already!!

alright, time for me to go to bed and continue another 5hours of
studies tommorrow.

SONIA CHEW,

FOR THE LAST 96 HOURS,

HOI TING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

2008-11-22T12:01:00.003+08:00

No Title

5 more working days to ma exams!

i am still sitting there, staring at ma revision papers.

stuck at all the unfamiliar questions!!!

4 papers to take!

40% pass rate for this ard.

just 40%, i don wish for high score,

just pass, i am more than happy!

"you can just to tell yourself that you can do it,

and you will be able to make it thru!"

a sentance where everyone will say to me.

that will only work out when i myslef ut in 100% of hardwork.

and i am NOT doing it right now.

felt like a useless shit.

not working, not earning any $$

not studying much, 24hrs at home,

spent onli less than 2 hours studying, 1 hour running,

and the rest of the 21 hours, slacking= play computer, watch hong kong drama,

sleep!!

happy that finally ma exams are coming,

going shopping at KL once exams are over!

but at the same time scare, cos i really dont wish to be handin up blank

answer scripts!!!

i pray and pray and pray. ALL i need is 40% passing scores!!

2008-11-16T01:57:00.004+08:00

再见了，黎礎寧！！RIP

星光3: third place.

2008-11-09T00:03:00.005+08:00

For all who loves me

just wanna say THANK YOU to whoever who are concern.

while sometime i wonder if either i have got too high expectations
in relationships or..
Ma past relationships ain't very successful (as some of you might know)
And one of the main reason is ma bad temper
and sticky-ness that they can't take it.
While i don't blame them cause i'm the problem in the first place.

so far, he's not seen my blog.
i have never want him to read it though he kept asking.
he wil probably be so mad and upset if he ever reads it.
cos most of the posts are all complaints abt him.
Well, sometimes its really hard to speak out all your sorrrows
to your friends. Thats why i am just typing it thru this blog.
Its actually just for me to spit out all my unhappiness and disatifations.

to my dearest bitchy soulmate
i really thank you for all the advices you gave me.
i know taht you are just caring and you don't wish to see me get hurt.
But i am sure, you know it's hard to just let go.
I guess i really need him in life.
He's part of ma life, i tells him EVERYTHING.
Can't imagine how my life will turn into without him.
I donno if this is just because i am use to him or is this love.
But all i know is, i need to treasure and cherish him.
Partly cos after reading Charlene's blog,
the more i feel that i will probably be as good as dead if he's no longer
living in the world.
And, i can feel his sister, i know it sounds sick! but ya,
it's like i had been thru thick and thins with him, which
i didnt do it with ma past relationships,
i am very sure, he means so much more than just a boyfriend.
He's like ma family, ma friend, ma punch bag.
so bicth, guess i really need at least one soulmate to be supporting
me, telling me that what ever decision i made is the right one.
Please don't dislike him or blame him for not able to give me
a happy life.

2008-11-08T14:54:00.005+08:00

一封简单的信

亲爱的大姐，

2008年11月08日，我坐在一个安静的角落头，听着《ANGEL》这首歌，

一的人，想跟上

帝祷告。突然就想到你。您现在是上帝身边的天使吗？

那如果我向祂诉苦你也听得见吗？

那如果要祷告我应该说什么呢？

还是您会如何领导我的？

祷告又是什么呢？

会让我感到比较平静吗？

大姐，教教我应该怎么做？

你看得到我们的未来吗？

我们又未来吗？

如果我们有未来，那会是怎样的呢？

会是幸福的吗？

会甜甜蜜蜜到老吗？

还是我们会分开？

如果没有未来，那我又应该怎么做？

现在就分开吗？

我有好多话想说但又会有谁会真正的听呢？

现在的我觉得自己好像白吃，。。。。

如果向祂祷告，我会说：

《亲爱的上帝，

请求你领到我，教导我，应该往哪里走。

也领到他，帮着他，让他能找到队的方向，

在这人生的道路上可以顺顺利利的把所有的事做好。

保护好他。

也帮着我，让我可以相信他，依赖他，让他来守护我吧！

AMEN。》

如果大姐您也听到我的祷告，不要笑我。

谢谢！

下笔，

玮琳

2008-11-01T14:03:00.002+08:00

there's nothing much to say

not in a mood of saying anything today.
feeling so borded on a saturday.
finally, 3months' getting over soon in 5 days!
sometimes things are just so strange,
when everything seems to come an end,
i just started to be closer to them.
when for steamboat with
mandy, celeste, julia, yuyu, germaine, shu ying, germaine, allyna and her first tiplet, cui ting
funny though, it's the first time we met, but the way we talk as though we know each other for quite a while.
haha
i made a new friend.
one more singing buddy,
no.. in fact 3 more.. germaine and allyna are k freaks too!!!
weeehuuuuuuuuuu!!!!
anw, jus don feel like saying anything.
just tot that i haven been blogging lately,
don wan my blog to be fill with dust!

2008-10-15T20:18:00.002+08:00

He's a nice guy, excepts that......... he loves the computer more.

When i have the pain, he's always there for me.
He brings me water and pills.
He feeds me his love and care.
He treats me like a baby, a princess, a queen.
He stays by my side and hopes he could be the one suffering.
He asks if i'm ok every now and then.

HOWEVER,

u know like they always say, people have got their good and bad points.

and the above are his good points...
here comes his bad points.

When i have the pain, he's always there for me. [ computer is always beside him]
He brings me water and pills. [then run back to his computer]
He feeds me his love and care. [ while playing his game]
He treats me like a baby, a princess, a queen. [ so that i can keep quite and give him the peace to play]
He stays by my side and hopes he could be the one suffering. [the computer is still beside him]
He asks if i'm ok every now and then. [once i'm ok he will stop asking and then.......

VISION BACK TO THE COMPUTER!!!!!!]

2008-10-04T12:10:00.007+08:00

A "different" kind of Date

1 Oct 2008

Wednesday

Hari Raya, Childrens' Day

Time left: 1300hrs

Time home: 2200 hrs

Venue: Orchard Road

Planner: Sonia Chew

Overall Performance: Just Pass

We haven't been going out, like a date, for a long long time.

I was so excited, sooo looking forward to it.

Always wanted to get back the feelings.

The feelings we used to have when we first got today.

I dont mind doing the planning.

On the day,

I dressed up nicely. ( as if it's my first date.)...... was still looking forward to it.....

but when i walk over to his room,

he wasnt ready at all. (was still gaming the com)..... disappointment one......

Then he took his own sweet time to shower and

in the end, he came out of the room, all dressed up..

in................................................

t shirts and berms!!!!!!!!...... disappointment two........

ma god!!

this is not what i had in ma plans..

becos of his dressing, we QUARRELLED!!

what the hell right?? ya i know, we actually quarrel before we even leave hus.

Ended up, he changed into jeans and t shirt. ( but unwillingly)

we left hus in black faces.

cold war started: 1300 hrs

at last, we cool down by the time we reached orchard.

when to collect our tickets.

then,

we went to take our neo print.

and then, watch movie,

FINAL STOP

to dinner,

at cafe cartel, PS.

i know its just a very normal date.

but it tells us alot of things thru this date.

1. There's no more excitment.

2. We don't teasure the mins we had together.

FINALLY,

THE FEELING AIN'T THE SAME ANYMORE!!!

2008-09-27T02:48:00.003+08:00

New HITS

SHE - 安静了

只剩下钢琴陪我站在这里

梦想中属於我们的婚礼

却成了单人结婚进行曲

在这场爱情角力的拔河里

爱我还是爱你

你选择了自己 wo~

撒娇的可爱的

迷人的爱哭的

照片里曾经的都是你喜欢的

如今我还在原地

你却走回你的记忆

你说我爱你太多就快要把你淹没

你害怕幸福短暂一秒就崩落

分开是一种解脱让你好好的想过

我想要的那片天空你是不是能够给我

你说我给你太多却不能给我什麽

分不清激情承诺永恒或迷惑

爱情是一道伤口我们各自苦痛

沉默是我最後温柔是因为我太爱你

只剩下钢琴陪我站在这里

梦想中属於我们的婚礼

安静了在我枕边的梦里

我知道相爱原本就不容易

爱不是一场雨

努力就有结局 wo~

撒娇的可爱的

迷人的爱哭的

照片里曾经的都是你爱着你的

连假的泪还温热

却没有人握我的手

你说我爱你太多就快要把你淹没

你害怕幸福短暂一秒就崩落

分开是一种解脱让你好好的想过

我想要的那片天空你是不是能够给我

你说我给你太多却不能给我什麽

分不清激情承诺永恒或迷惑

爱情是一道伤口我们各自苦痛

沉默是我最後温柔是因为我太爱你

2008-09-25T22:59:00.002+08:00

COMMERCIAL BREAKS!

2008-09-25T22:22:00.002+08:00

Compare, Compare, Compare, comapare, compare

when i'm all alone

when i've got nothing to do

when i roll around in bed at night

when he's not around with me

when i'm feel bored

.....

'why is she looks prettier than i do?"

STOP COMPARING, WILL YOU?

"why is her family's richer than mine?"

STOP COMPARING, WILL YOU?

"why are her freinds are more than mine?"

STOP COMPARING , WILL YOU?

"why are they smarter than me?'

STOP COMPARING , WILL YOU?

"Why so they prefer her than me?"

STOP COMPARING, WILL YOU?

"Why can she do it and i can't?"

STOP COMPARING, WILL YOU?
....

that's what i wanna do for the rest of my life?

that'a how i wanna live?

...

i ask myself

...

now i'm not alone

now i got SOMETHING to do

now i can sleep once i lay on bed

now i don't feel bored

....

then why the hell am i talking to the computer

2008-09-17T20:45:00.000+08:00

What 's the matter?

I think i need to see a doctor. I'm having a weird kind of stress. and its making me crazy lately. I'm scare i can't do well in my studies. and my work as well, Time files super fast on weekends. I'm so scare to go to work everyday. i donno what's wrong with me. I know if i tell anuyone this, they will probably laugh at me. "why stress? like that only stress. so lousy!!"

who can i tell this to? who's willing to listen to my nonsense.

Dada will say, " Don't think so much la!"

Friends will say," You can make it de, have faith in yourself!"

Family will say, " aiya! it's like that one. Everyone's going through the same things. Just need time to get use to it."

Positive comments give me stress cos i'm afraid to let them down. However, negative comments kills me too. i know i'm very ma fan.

until now, i still don't really know what i want. I HAVE to study cos it SUPPOSE to give me a better future. As i grow older, i have doubts in wonder i can cope it or not.

DAMNIT!!!! What the matter with me?? can anyone pls tell me?

2008-09-17T20:13:00.003+08:00

MISSING YOU - 范逸臣

2008-09-10T23:08:00.005+08:00

thanks to ms jamilah and ms gail!!!

2008-09-07T10:41:00.000+08:00

Treasure & Cherish

Thanks to Bitchy Von i get to know about this blog.

A blog full of sadness and pain.

Read this blog on sunday morning,

tears kept rolling down my cheeks.

i will never be able to feel how much pain she (the blogger) feel and even so,

i hope i will never experience it.

couldnt imagine how my life will be like if dada leave me one day.

(leave as in really out of this world.)

Though i'm a stranger to her,

i can feel her pain just by reading her blog.

the words she used are so real and

it reflects deeply on what and how she felt.

probably if i were her,

i will be so lost...

"cherish while you still have the chance to.

So that you will live with no regrets!

要珍惜！！！" -hongwei

and because he experienced it, he understands what this sentance really means.

2008-09-06T10:33:00.000+08:00

TWO blogs that i would like to share to those who have not read it:

http://www.charleneyl.blogspot.com/

http://ashleyisourangel.blogspot.com/

2008-08-28T21:00:00.010+08:00

Fav song of the week:

你走天桥我走地下道

作词：简志霖/林宥佐作曲：林宥佐

阳光照耀不到你的心像冰冷冷的地窖

把我心燃烧也得不到拥抱

所有争吵让一切的美好停在我的手表

漫漫的消耗消失在每分每秒

把你握紧却捏碎了

真心无法作比较

就算我爱得很霸道

看你走了天桥我走了地下道

你和我的爱情就遗落在街角

看你越过分隔岛

我转进单行道一路把过去甩掉

忘了曾经说过要一起到老

（忘了曾说过要一起到老）

我的眼睛已模糊失焦

在这条曾经说过要一起走的幸福大道

2008-08-25T22:13:00.007+08:00

I'M UNDER ITS CONTROL

"Everytime i see ur face, my body shiver in fear.

i know that i will never be able to overcome it.

you make me feel depress, you spoil my bloody mood.

what am i suppose to do now?

why are you so hard to understand?

this time round, i lose to you again,

will i ever win you?

i have to win you this next round

cos i dont have so much money to fight with you.

paper 5.... theory paper!

hate you!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

SHIT MAN!!! FAIL!! WHA LAU!! Although i already know what kind of marks i will get when i stepped into the exam hall, still i was so damn sad when i saw the result slip like 10 mins ago. it's always theory papers that i will fail terribly.... and now i can feel the pain even more cos i'm the one paying for the paper. ma god... another 41 pounds to pay!! that's a lot of money for a poor little gal like mi.. sian lo. totally got no mood now!

2008-08-23T11:24:00.005+08:00

CHERISH YOUR LOVE ONES BEFORE THEY LEAVE

YOU!!!!!

2008-08-22T23:11:00.000+08:00

PROMISE : verbal commitment by one person to another agreeing to do (or not to do) something in the future

2008-08-16T16:38:00.001+08:00

MA GOD!! IT'S SAT!!!
today, it's sat. i'm now at dada'a house. i've gt nothing to do. just sittin in front of his lag com...

watching for my 超级星光大道第三季 finals to load. damn lag can. like have to wait for it to load completely then i can watch. and his keyboard sucks too man. so hard. can't type properly. wha lau! damn fed up liao. lol... will be going "hai fun chun" at jb later to eat seafood cos it's dada's brother's birthday. went there once with vicky and dada... food there quite nice. but the journey there quite long cos it's in the village(kangpong) area. so have to drive thru the roads that are not actually real roads.. just a path where there are lots of bumps and mud.

I'm in lots of stress!! at work and in class. haiz, pass two days, i;m been rushing my work like crazy. so many things i'm still blur. and i have to complete it by the end of the day. somemore i made quite a big mistake on thursday. didnt know how to call the bank to buy xchange rate. wha, after all it's my first job in the office right. how will i know man. lucky wwee meng(manager) didnt scold me only tell me to becareful next time. so tiring. then after that still need to go to school. wha au, so sleeply but cos i pay so much to study, i cant waste it. so i need to ren. went for class(tax) ytd night. ALONE! that david lee left me alone to meet his friends for dinner. so tiring but in the end, i stay till the end!!!! so proud of myself! lolx. nonsense. (wha lau! the keyboard really sucks! type until hand pain liao!) anw, ya....

wanted to put pic de. but then i realise there's not cable for my phone here. so no choice, another boring post with all words. ike an essay!

alrights, looking forward to see the bitches tml. steamboat at bugis!

ENJOY AND CHERISH THE WEEKENDS!

2008-08-10T16:02:00.001+08:00

VERY HIGH AND DRUNK!!

AUG 08, This is the night when i was so drunk. In my 21 life, never had i drink till drop. will never forget that experience man. How should i describe the horrible feeling? i can't stand or sit still. My vision is so blur. Feel like vomiting. We drank each a jug of voka lime, den hao yang treat me one shot. later, we had another 3 straight shots and then my first NIGHTMARE begun. We didn't even really dance. Can't even stand straight how to dance. I bet i did some ugly moves where david and everyone else saw. Luckily dada went too. he was the one who really take care of me, through out my whole horrible feeling, i keep hearing him say this, "dont worry, dada is here. just lean over. i will take care of you!" (in chinese) Jing was drunk too. but she kept saying that she was not drunk. LOLZ... she looked so funny and she said funny things too. oopss! don't laugh at her, think i did act and say funny things too. i actually know what i was doing, it's just then, my body is controlling me..

AUG 09, this is my second NIGHTMARE!!! When i woke up at 9am, my head was spinning ard. soooooo dizzy and pain. there's when the puking started. after the puke no.1, i felt better. and one hour later, puke no.2 start. and continue puke no.3 and 4 and 5..... REALLY TERRIBLE!!! don't feel like eating or drinking water, stomach so yucky.. i slept until 5pm!!!! ma god. then i had my FIRST meal of the day. FISH MEAT SOUP NOODLE. only the soup is nice. the fish is nice too but the more i eat the more i feel like puking. and the funny thing is, dad saw me puking and he called baolin and ask if i'm pregnant cos he kept seeing me puke. Baolin was so shocked and called me quickly to checked. I told her i was drank too much the night before that's why i vomit and she laugh. lol... my dad was so dumb!! vomit means pregnant meh??!!! then at night, i was much better. stay home to watch NDP parade. After so many years, this was the one time i really sat down and watch the parade. For the past years, i will never be at home on national day. But this year, it's cos i cant go out, too tired to go out. that's why i have no choice but to watch. lolz.. but in the end, i still went out. went for a movie with benno and hao yang and dada!! "journey to the center of the earth." quite nice... and funny.. and exciting. By the end of the day, stomach still weak. still feeling disgusting. kept wanting to burp but i just cant burp...
Finally, too tired, fall aslp.

AUG 10, today, feeling alot better. still a little dizzy, donno if it's still due to the "drunkness"
or am i just so WEAK!! stay at home on a sunday.... boring.. dada dont wanna go out.. just going moive later at 6pm. "MOney not enough 2" hope it will be funny. dont wanna waste money.. now ticket's getting more and more x loh... haiz... bank left only 90 bucks. how to survive until end of the month. have to save up liao.

alright, write so much, tired liao. gonna have a nap. weekend pass so quickly. a few more hours, it will soon be money and my stress will begin again..

GOODBYE WEEKENDS, HELLO MONDAY!!

2008-08-08T19:54:00.000+08:00

IT"S FRIDAY!!! CLUBBING!!!!

WEEHOO!!! Friday!! I'm super happy. Skip tax lesson again. Going double o later. i hope it will be happening later. so many people going. (jing, lian, david, hao yang & frens, 2 bens, dada, von & frens, sara) too bad lynnest cant go. need to accompany mother. hmm....

The pass 4 days were torturing man!! REALLY feel like giving up!! Eveyday is work school work school.. for the pass few lessons i really cannot take it, sleep in class.. At work need to absord as much things as possible. then in class also need to memorise formats and notes... THanks to all my friends who ask me to jia you!! really appreciate that couragement!! It's like i'm starting to feel like an alien. Donno what's happening outside the world, donno what's the latest tv programmes, can't eat home food. every night our dinner is fast food fast food bread and more fast food and bread!! Only ytd we get to eat mix vege rice. like so poor thing hor. but no choice, no matter wat i cannot give up. cannot let anyone look down on me, if most of the people at my workplace are 21 and they can do well, i can do well too!! it's just a matter of time.

Today is day 2 on my own. Starting to get the hang of it liao. but poor Vivian(superior) , david and i keep asking her questions. Hope that my mentor (Jean) can pass her operation on monday. She needs to do a bone marrow transplant. Just like dada's da jie. But jean's lucky cos she's able to find a suitable one. Looking at her, so weak on her face but her character is so bubbly and positive. Knowing that she will loose all her hair during the treatment, she still can go ard joking that she need to go get a scaf soon... if not she go out not pretty liao. so strong rite?? hmm, i think if it's me, i will be so negative about everything!! Hope that she can go throught it well..

alright. gotta start to get ready for club!!

2008-08-03T22:11:00.003+08:00

Friday plus Saturday plus Sunday

Haven't been blogging for 2 days. hmm.. i went back home with dada on fri nite. Skip half of the tax class on fri. The tax teacher was damn boring lo. Her voice makes david wanna sleep. It's so funny cos once david hear her voice, he would just doze off. As in really sleep. You can imagine how boring is the lesson. lolz.. once she say " ok.. i'll give you 20 mins break." we were like "yeah!! go home!!" .. hope that we won't fail this paper.

MA GOD!!!! Tml will be the day!! Chek chek was so exaggerating when he tell me that the office world is so much different than in his center. As usual, everything he says always sounds so right to him.. "i'm sure you won't be able to take the stress of work load and the polities in the company. then you will give up." Because of this sentence from him, the more i will prove him wrong man! hmm..

Spent the day with David and Dada today. At first david and i went to his mother's chicken rice stall to have lunch. (but the main reason there was cos david want to take money from his mother) Anyway, then we went to meet Dad at orchard. First time in my 21 life, i stepped into LOUIS VUITTON shop at taka. I have never dare to go in because from the outside it looks like only RICH people can go in and the staffs working there will look down on those who don't dress nicely or branded. Until one day, one day Dada said to me," Those who work at branded shops are not rich also what. So who are they to look down on you?" it's true la. but you know when they give you the face you see liao also will bu shuang de ma. Anyway, it really didn't feel as "high class" as it seems from outside. Everyone who go in don really dress branded-ly.. some even just wear t-shirt and bems.

We shopped at orchard almost the whole day trying to buy clothes for work. We went Heeren for a while, couldn find anything. David took like 1hour at john little and he got 2 shirts and 1 pants. Then we went Centerpoint. The clothes there are so expensive. Even if there are any nice once, i can't afford it yet. Then david got another pink shirt. And i still got NOTHING yet!! Sianz.... From centerpiont, we walked backwards to F....A....R....E....A....S....T.......... Wow! Very far loh. The guys started complaining and finally we reached there. Got a Shirt and skirt from RED 2. RED 2!!!!! jurong point also got loh.. Shopped till 6.30pm.... and finally i got 1 shirt 1 skirt 1 dress. Phew.. what a tiring day. spent like more than $170. that's a lot.

After that, went dinner at ferrar road, Westlake restuarant, gong gong they all. The food was not too bad. Only the mango pudding for dessert, yuck!, not up to standard.

Alright, it's almost 11pm. Gotta go to bed, so excited to go to work tml. will post up my office wear when i have nothing to do.

*Lights off*

2008-07-30T16:14:00.013+08:00

After a year, i am finally going out to see the world. everyone say it's tough out there. people cannot be easily trusted. they make it sound so scary. gonna miss all the little devils.. wonder if they will still remember me when i'm gone. i hope they will. hahah.

Hugges and kisses to all my devils from ms sonia:

It's Wednesday today!! Ladies' nite man. but too bad lynnest cannot take leave. Feel like dance and singing and drinking!! haha Drink till drank like a crazy woman so that i can forget all the unhappy stuff. Still affected by what mummy told me in the morning, sometimes i really don't understand why we just cant's communicate to each other like how others communicate to their mum nicely. It's like when i see the way Ee-Ee talks to Wilson they all.. and then see the way mum talk to us.. it's like i rather keep quiet thru out the whole day. So tired of the quarrel we always have.

Ahhhh.. not in good mood today. early morning already spoil my mood..

Her FIRST Time

2008-07-25T18:32:00.001+08:00

Her FIRST Time

Her very first post written.
always wanted to have a blog but never had a chance to do it.
Thanks to Celia, finally her blog is born.
hmm.. what should i write today.
nothing much she guess.
skip class today. boring taxation by this boring teacher.
david going clubbing.
make her wanna club too.
well guess that's all for today.